We spent the weekend in a cabin in upstate New York where the water was non-potable and came directly from the nearby lake. We had to brush our teeth with bottled water and skip washing grapes and carrots–preferring a few specs of dirt and grime over “beaver fever.” So, of course this was just some tiny inconvenience in our very privileged lives. It’s so easy to focus on the small, first-world problems we encounter in our daily living (I am all too guilty of this!) but damn, it just takes one small disruption to my safe and simple life to knock me on my ass and get me thinking about the bigger picture. People have real problems in the world–like, trying to survive. Meanwhile, we flush drinking water down the toilet on a regular basis.

I grew up in California, which means you grow up water-savvy and water-conscious. Even after fifteen years in New York City, I still cannot fill a bathtub more than half-way, leave the tap on while brushing my teeth, let the water get adequately heated before hopping under a shower head. If there is a drip it must be remedied immediately, dishes are washed with as little water as possible, washing machines are stuffed to maximum capacity to minimize the total number of loads–I’m pretty sure that last one is a really dumb idea.

The point is, I have mass amounts of water-phobia. Yeah, I’d call it a phobia. I get sick to my stomach, a nervous twinge in my gut if I leave the water on for too long. I guess it’s from growing up with that consciousness–with the idea of conservation being ingrained in me from very early on. The strange thing is, I cannot pull up one memory of someone telling me to turn the water off, to be more careful, to take shorter showers. I can’t think of one single instance from my childhood of an adult lecturing me on water use. Which leads me to one of two conclusions: either the habit was formed by implicit modeling, or I blocked out those memories for whatever reason.

I am inclined to believe it is the latter since there are giant chunks missing from my brain. Although, I suppose it is possible that it was simply through living in one way when it comes to water–never questioning or testing that boundary–that I picked up these habits. And, perhaps they continue due to a physical inability to dislodge them as well as a cerebral propensity toward them. I don’t know. But, I do know that heading back west will not change much in terms of my water consumption. It will not be a difficult transition because I have not been able to rid myself of the constant nagging in the back of my brain, saying TURN THAT TAP OFF!